I took my little 7-diamond ring into Spence Jewelers to be sized down to a pinkie ring. Currently it's a 4.5, to fit my right ring finger. I am getting it sized down to a 3. Taking a cue from Oprah, I decided that my little band of hope should sit on my pinkie as my own version of the now famous "AH" ring.
For those of you who aren't Oprah fans, the AH ring is worn on the right pinkie finger and means "Available and Happy". Or if you are in a relationship, it can mean "Attached and Happy". Either way, it's a way for women who aren't married to have diamonds and be able to wear them without any real connotation attached. Here's a link to the expensive Oprah version: http://www.divinediamonds.com/ahring.php And here's a picture of my ring:
The last time I went to Spence was with Simon, to have that ring sized to fit my ring finger. Before that, it was to buy my wedding band. All Spence rings come with a 5 year warranty, which covers sizing and replacing lost stones. So we are on file there as Mr. & Mrs.
(A quick aside here. The day we bought my wedding band, Simon accused me of checking out and flirting with the guy who sold it to us. Holy red flag Batman. Why did I go through with it anyway? Love is blind indeed.)
I gave my married name to the lady at the counter. Saying it made me feel weird, like I was pretending to be someone else. She then asked me why I want to get the ring sized. What she probably meant was, whether the ring is too big or too small. However my brain interpreted the question as "What's going on with you and Simon?"
A million answers started streaming through my brain:
"We're not together anymore but I still want to wear one piece of jewelery he gave me."
"I don't want to give off the wrong signals to potential new boyfriends so I am making this a pinkie ring to be absolutely clear in my message to single men."
"I threw him out and I'm trying to reclaim my life, and this is one way for me to show my independence."
"I originally wanted this ring to be my wedding band, and thank goodness I went with a different one, otherwise this would be sitting in a box keeping my engagement ring company."
"Does it matter WHY? It's my ring BITCH, stop asking questions and just size the damn thing."
What actually came out of my mouth was, "Um...uh....I want it to be a pinkie ring, so I can be cool like that."
BE COOL LIKE THAT??? Cool like what, Oprah? My brain is so damaged from all of this, I can't even complete a simple task like sizing a ring without being a total retard about it.
Anyway, she took my pinkie's measurement, slapped a bar code onto an little envelope and shoved the ring into it. On the envelope she wrote Simon's name. That made my heart stop for a few beats. When they call to let me know it's ready, they will be calling for Simon, not me.
As I was driving home, I came to the stark realization that if and when Simon gets into another committed relationship, he'll probably go to Spence to buy a piece of jewelery to demonstrate his undying love for someone who isn't me. It'll be funny though when my name comes up on the file.
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